Your Action Checklist for a Stronger Family
Use this checklist to empower yourself and create a positive, stable environment for your children.
1. Make Decisions from Confidence, Not Fear
Pro Tip: Consult with a legal or divorce professional to understand your rights and options.
Action: Write down one area where you can replace fear with knowledge this week.
2. Respond, Don’t React
Pro Tip: Use the BIFF method (Brief, Informative, Friendly, Firm) for all communication.
For a full breakdown of how to use BIFF — plus four more communication strategies that work when co-parenting is anything but easy, read: 5 Communication Lifelines for Divorcing a Narcissist →
Action: Before replying to your ex, pause and ask, “Is this response necessary and helpful?”
3. Focus on Your Parenting, Not Your Ex’s
Pro Tip: Let go of trying to control your ex’s actions.
Action: List two things you can do to create a positive home environment for your kids.
4. Look Forward, Not Back
Pro Tip: Set a small, achievable goal for yourself this month—something just for you.
Action: Write down one way you’ll focus on your future, not your past.
5. Keep Adult Issues with Adults
Pro Tip: Share your feelings with a trusted friend or therapist, not your children.
Action: Identify one support person you can reach out to this week.
For a closer look at how oversharing — even unintentionally — affects your kids, and how to course-correct, read: How Good, Loving Moms Accidentally Hurt Their Kids During Divorce →
6. Prioritize Self-Care
Pro Tip: Even 10 minutes a day for yourself makes a difference.
Action: Schedule one self-care activity this week and stick to it.
7. Use Direct Communication—Not Your Kids
Pro Tip: Never use your children as messengers.
Action: Commit to handling all co-parenting communication directly with your ex.
8. Speak Respectfully About Your Ex
Pro Tip: If you can’t say something positive, say nothing at all in front of your children.
Action: Practice one neutral or positive statement about your co-parent this week.
9. Create Consistent Routines and Boundaries
Pro Tip: Consistency helps children feel safe and secure.
Action: Review your family’s routines and identify one area to make more predictable.
Wondering how to maintain consistency when children are moving between two households? Read: Pros and Cons of Nesting in Divorce: Is It the Right Choice for Your Family? →
Reflection & Notes:
What’s one commitment you’ll make this week to support your family’s well-being?
Ready for more support?
Want to go deeper on what to avoid as a co-parent after divorce? Read: 9 Parenting Mistakes to Avoid After Divorce →
If you’re ready to stop spinning your wheels and start moving forward with clarity and confidence, I invite you to a Complimentary Divorce Clarity Call.
For more resources, visit http://www.empoweringdivorcecoaching.com or connect on Instagram and Facebook.
